Well surprise surprise! As cliche as it sounds, I can’t believe it’s been an entire freakin year since I’ve last posted a blog! Did anyone even notice? Did you miss me?? Well, doesn’t matter now because I’m back! For a brief moment in time or a bit longer is still yet to be determined. I have no idea where to even begin, but perhaps I’ll just begin at the beginning? Now let’s see, exactly one year ago, where did I leave off? There is a handy trick I use to determine just this very thing. I’ll go look in my camera roll on my phone to see what pictures I was taking around that time. As pictures are basically 1,000 words rolled into one, it usually sparks up some sort of memory of my life at the time of the picture being taken… so hold please while I go do that!
Wow! I really did just go down a long rabbit hole seeing my past year in photo review. From the looks of it all, it seems like I mostly took a diving plunge into the deep end of creation. When I started up a separate instagram account for all of my crochet work, I had no idea it would take off the way it has. I’ve met creators from all over the world, some who have said how much they admire and are inspired by my work. People who I don’t even know have asked me to make custom pieces for them. Even a few brands have sponsored me with free yarn and supplies! My hands are rarely idle these days due to constant work on new things. I believe that’s one of the reasons I haven’t had time to work much on my writing. It’s so crazy because, if only I got the same support for my writing as I do for my fiber art, I probably wouldn’t have got so deep into it. I do very much enjoy both outlets, but it takes a lot to constantly pursue a passion when you don’t get the reactions you expect. I get the most feedback about the things I make, so that gives me encouragement to make more. But ALSO, the other revelation I had was my engagement might be more involved because of the space I’ve curated amongst others interested in the same thing as I am. For example, with my blog, I never did any sort of targeted marketing or advertising to groups of people interested in a random girl exchanging psychoanalytical witty repartee with her multiple personalities, I just advertised it to my current group of friends and web following. Big mistake… huge! Sure, some people will be interested in and support whatever it is you do, but the fact of the matter is, if it isn’t something they are initially passionate about, their interest will fade. On my crochet instagram, I specifically follow accounts that are crochet/knit/fiber based. I’m interested in their stuff, they’re interested in mine. It’s a HUGE difference in how you’re supported.
In addition to the handmade hoopla, I somehow got roped into a job! Let me explainnnnn! So last year, a few days after I put out my last blog post, I started to look for other things that could help my get better at making (sewing, crochet, knit, design, business, etc). I also really, really started to crave human connection after spending so much time working on things alone. I went to handy dandy craigslist (Ya know, sidenote: Craigslist gets a lot of flak as being a semi shady website, but honestly, CL is responsible for a lot of the great opportunities in my life over the years! Don’t knock it)! I came across an ad looking for a freelance seamstresses. I mean, I can sew a little bit, I wasn’t amazing, but I decided to check out the website anyway. It was very aesthetically pleasing! Browsing the site a bit more, I saw the location. I had to look twice because I thought it was showing MY location. Believe it or not, this place was ACROSS the street from my house. It was just too much of a coincidence so I messaged anyway. Turns out, the lady who posted the add was the owner of a super cool small business that she runs in her house, selling craft supplies. Like, what?? We chatted a bit and I went over to see the space the next day. I told her I really can’t sew all that great, but would love to help out and do other things and learn from the process of a startup company. She said sure! Ever since then, I have been making all different kinds of new things, learning about new fabrics, materials and textures. I even learn a bit about how a small business runs. It was just all too perfect and unbelievable. I didn’t even realize I started working again because I was so interested in learning and basically creating all day. In my defense, it’s not working for “the man”, and I look at it more so working WITH. It’s also still super flexible since it’s literally across the darn street. Ugh, it was just the perfect fit for my life! Honestly though, it does help a BIT with the lack of social interaction, but not entirely, as I am still often working on things by myself (and there are only two other people). So alas, my social journey is not yet complete.
Which now brings me to the fact that I’m still going to my weekly therapy (whenever I’m in town of course). It has been great to have that time each week to check in with myself and make sure I’m as self aware as I can be regarding my feelings, desires, and intentions in life. We ARE still working through my social awkwardness (and/or social disdain, I haven’t figured out which it is). It’s one of the most stagnant areas of my life. Perhaps I’ve even put it out of my mind as of recently. But each week that I go back, I’m reminded that I still have work to do in that department. But like most things in my life, I try not to dwell or contrive forced situations. I will have my organically grown core social circle in no time! Especially since in addition to the logistical and emotional based field of therapy, I’ve started to reach deeper into the realm of the stars, moon, and universe. In other words, astrology! I know I know, some people have yet to get on the astro bandwagon, but it really is a very fascinating insight if nothing else. I mean think about it though, the human body is over 60% water, the moon literally controls the tides. You mean to tell me the stars have nothing to do with how we live? Anywhooo, I’ll hush for now, but I’m gonna formulate more thoughts on the matter…
The last major development over the past year is a little more shocking than the others. I went (semi) vegetarian! Me! Can you believe it? I haven’t (barely) eaten meat since about May. The reason you might ask? Nothing super particular other than mostly a personal challenge to see how long I could do it for. Then I guess I just wanted to see if it would make a difference in how I felt physically overall. There hasn’t been much of a change in that regard, but I don’t really miss meat too much. If you have good enough (seasoned) plant based food, you don’t even really need the meat. I eat Indian food a LOT, which is largely a plant based cuisine anyway, and Mediterranean food as well. Also, it’s fun to try out all the foods I’ve never tried before! Ugh, who have I become?? I do still think vegans can be kind of annoying sometimes, that hasn’t changed. I’ve tried vegan stuff here and there, but dammit I love cheese too much. I’m not gonna beat myself up if I have a turkey sandwich every now and then. I’m human! And they are freakin delicious. But I do mostly eat vegetarian though, and it’s been going well if I do say so myself.
Welp y’all, thanks for going back down memory lane with me. It’s good to reflect on things. The years do go by much quicker the older I get. Didn’t even feel like a year. I feel as though even things do change, and sometimes drastically, they start to set in certain ways that become routine. I do hope I can keep growing and learning more and more so I can have bigger and better life updates. I’m probably not gonna start up my blog again every week…not just yet… however I do have another venture I’m gonna start exploring. A crochet related blog! This might not interest a lot of you, but I figure I could combine my two loves of writing and crochet to give a more in depth look at my artistic process. Eh, we shall see how it goes, but those posts will be coming very soon. I really would also like to hear what everyone else has been up to over the past year. I’m sure I’m leaving a ton out too, so if you wanna know anything else, just let me know!
P.s. One of my goals I do want to start working on with my therapist is being more open. It’s crazy because you’d think a blog of my life over the past 10 years would seem pretty open, but I still feel as though I’m inhibited in a lot of ways.
P.p.s. Oh crap I almost forgot the most important update of them all! I finally got my new Macbook this summer! It’s been a long road but I’m so happy I no longer have to struggle with the shenanigans of my old one. Ironically enough though, I no longer have internet in my apartment (too expensive), and I use my phone as a hot spot most of the time. Darn gift of the Magi!
P.p.p.s. I would also like to dedicate this post to a really good friend of mine who passed away this weekend. A really big shook as he was just a year older than me. Not a lot of people have donated to this site, but he was one of the few who did give what he could and offered continual encouragement. Rest in Peace Will!