Back in the day, it seems like birthday were a much bigger deal than they become over the years (sheesh, I really am obsessed with nostalgia. Every other darn blog I'm talking about something from "back in the day"). I distinctly remember a few of my birthdays; my 6th (because I had a party, and my parents filmed it. Plus I was super cute), my 10th (because I got my ears pierced and my little sisters were both super jealous), my 16th, (I actually don't remember my 18th) and my 21st. Usually, the 16th, 18th, and 21st are the most celebrated in American culture. Each one representing a certain milestone being passed in our lives. In case you hadn't guessed it by now, it's my birthday week! So yeap, just like New Year's Eve, I do a bit of reflecting on my life up until this point and how it can continue to improve.
First off, I really just wanna say how thankful I am that I made it through all these years! Sometimes it seems like everyone and everything in this world is trying to kill you! Like a live-action video game with no reset button. Even though I am technically still young, current events, such as the recent number of school shootings, make me realize just how far I have made it in retrospect. One frightening statistic I recently came across while researching for this post, is the life expectancy in Swaziland between 2005 and 2010 and a mere 29.9 years old . Imagine being expected to not make it into your 30s! It's truly a miracle. This is one of the reasons why I'm constantly trying to improve every day rather than remaining stagnant and complacent. Even if we are currently happy with ourselves and how we've chosen to live our lives, the world itself will never reach a perfect zenith, so we could always work on improving life for everyone else. I'm just the kind of person who always knows I can be so much better. That's why I'm constantly reevaluating like a mad woman.
Not sure why it seems like this, but with all of my evaluating, it also seems as though everytime my birthday gets closer, I have all these things to do for some reason. I feel like this week is packed with random crap I sort of have to get done and get out of the way before Saturday, as if trying to tie up loose ends. Why is that? It often adds to the anxiety of birthdays I suppose. What will the day bring? Will it be over before you even know it? Probably. Even looking forward to a certain date can have your anxiousness getting the best of you. Perhaps this is why I don't like to plan things. Planning makes time go by so much faster, which is interesting. Whenever I have nothing to look forward to, time seems to go at such a plodding pace. One of these days, I'd really like to sit down with all of the other conspiracy theorizing hippie dips like me and discuss the weirdness of time as we've come to know it. One day.
Surprisingly enough, I don't even mind getting older anymore. I've officially crossed the age threshold where I just flat out embrace it. And why not! It's inevitable. Instead of resisting, it's much more comfortable to embrace. When I was in Hawaii earlier this month, I went to a waterfall where you could actually swim in the water! I don't really know how to swim all that well, but I had on a life jacket, so I decided I'd try and go right underneath the falls (like I'd seen so many times before in the movies). I had no idea how hard it would be to swim against the force of the water. It was the hardest I had worked in a very very long time. I literally almost gave up, but pushed my body to its limits and finally made it! After the 20 minutes it took for me to catch my breath, I decided to head back to shore. By that, I mean simply getting into the water and letting it carry me back to shore. Easy peasy! Now that particular scenario doesn't have anything to do with me resisting perse, but it made me think of a real live version of "go with the flow" and how freakin easy it is, as opposed to resisting nature and going against the current. It's super hard and sure you might EVENTUALLY make it, but you'll b hella out of breath when you get there, and you'll ultimately have to turn right back around anyway...
Anywho yall, thanks for listening to all of my crazed ramblings... today and every day for the past few years. If I do say so myself, I'm most proud of the improvement in my writing over the many years. As long as I keep it consistent, I can see myself improving even more in the many years to come. The next time you read a post by me, I'll be a whole new old person! I can't wait to get more life insight and pass it down to the generations to come. Perhaps I should even print this out and keep it in my back pocket all week in case I have a surprise random birthday bash where someone yells "Speech!". But then again, any true friends of mine will have already read this in its entirety and won't need to hear it again.... right you guys?!
P.s. Seriously though, what the heck did I do on my 18th birthday?? I honestly don't remember. What I DO remember is a few months after, getting a billion pre-approvals for credit cards I didn't need, and thinking I had a bunch of free money to toss around. And therein lies the downfall of my credit as I knew it...before it even began. Why don't they teach finance in high school??
P.p.s. This may be exposing myself a little bit, but I remember a few years ago, during my wilder days, I took a very interesting drug that really messed with my sense of time. I was eating a popsicle, and I put it down for a sec. I went back to pick it up, what seemed like 2 hours later, and it hadn't melted yet. I was freakin out!
P.p.p.s. As most of you know, I'm not the most materialistic person on the planet, but here is my wishlist in case you give a crap! But if you don't wanna spend a dime, sharing my website with someone is always acceptable!