So this is kind of a vanity post. But hey, why the heck not! I think it's long over due with all of the philosophical malarkey I usually talk about. Also, this is a bit of an effort to reach out to more of my female readers (analytics is my best friend people, numbers don't lie). Today I will be talking about a very important thing that often consumes my life. My freakin' hair! Rarely the best of times, often the worst of times, but I've been with my hair my whole life. I'm sure most of you all have as well (with your own hair ofcourse). Over the years, women especially have been conditioned to form an emotional bond with their hair. Why is this? Why are so many things in life dependent upon what grows out of the top of our heads? I know we try not to be defined by it, but are we not our hair?
I will begin first off by saying that I do not by any means think that I have bad hair. All hair really is good (as long as it's healthy). However, my hair is, and has always been, extremely unmanageable! Most of the time spent on it is just trying to get everything under control. Now, let's start from the beginning shall we? As a child growing up, my mom tried her very best to manage 3 tangled little heads the best she could. There weren't as many resources about my hair type back in the day. It was pretty much perm or braids (or 'who done it and don't know why'). I remember it took hours (or so it seemed in my childlike mind), and it hurt soooo bad. Also, when everything was done, my hair was in a bunch of awkwardly placed braids around my head. I hated that style! This was the beginning of my hair demise. When I got old enough, I tried to start doing my hair myself, in a more humane, and less painful manner. I started to realize that doing hair was actually kinda fun. I started doing my sisters' hair as well (for a small fee or chore exchange ofcourse). I learned how to wash, blow dry, braid, curl, and straighten, all by myself! I eventually started doing my mom and dad's hair too. Doing hair was just a blast! When I got to the 7th grade however, me and my sisters convinced my mom to let us all get perms. That was the straightest my hair had ever been at that point in my life. I felt on top of the world! My hair was so long and silky down my back. I could actually run my fingers through it and feel my scalp. I could easily change from one hairstyle to another without hours of combing and products. It was truly great. But alas... as soon as my hair came in contact with water, it was no longer as silky. Blah! Over the next few years, I experimented a lot more with my hair. Always in search of that perfect manageable style. I got into color experimentation and that's when it went downhill. My hair started to become much more damaged. Also, one hair dresser cut a huge amount claiming it was due to "split ends"..... A few years later, I had it cut super short for the sake of a "makeover". A few more years and home colorings after that, here I am today. It seems as though my hair has been running my entire life!
Some of you may not know this about me, but there are some days when I won't go out into the world because of my hair. Sometimes my hair will set my entire mood for the day. Out of the 3 factors that it takes for me to get ready to leave the house everyday (clothes, make up, hair), my hair definitely takes the longest. My hair is usually always the centerpiece of my entire look. Somedays I really do just think about shaving it all off and wearing wigs the rest of my life. They are much more predictable. I always admire those girls who DO actually cut all of their hair off. It seems so freeing. From what I hear, it's also a major milestone in an entire new outlook on their life. Sort of like a new chapter. Hair really can change a person. And that is so crazy to me! Should all of these emotions and feelings really be attached to something so... material? Is hair an extension of our being? Of out existence? I have to start looking a little deeper than just the surface if I want to get to the root (haha, get it? the ROOT?? Anywho...) of the problem. Hair really should be something fun and empowering, not super stressful like I always make mine out to be. It should certainly not rule my life or my mood.
Hair, like everything else about us, is specifically unique to each individual. It is something that we are given to live with for our entire lives. Some people are even born without any at all! Whatever type of hair we have growing from our heads, we should try and embrace each strand. Most importantly, we should try to keep it healthy and stop all the damage. Hair is a part of our body you know. We should treat it as such. Embracing your natural hair type is a great thing, but this doesn't mean that we still can't experiment and have fun with our styles. Nothing pains me more than to see a person with natural hair preaching from the mountain tops about weaves and straightening processes. Let folks switch it up! That's the best part about hair! I actually love weaves. I think a lot of them look so cool. I actually really want one someday (but it has to be a GOOD one). This goes the same for all the weavy wonders out there too. Don't knock the natural people for being natural! I've been wearing my hair in it's natural form for the past few months now (mainly because I'm not quite sure what next major change I'm gonna do), but from time to time people will give me that "why don't you do something with your hair" look. Ughhh, I'm trying yall.
At the end of the day, me and my hair must learn to be one. I must stop hating and resisting it's force. We should join forces! As with everything in life, we tend to fear and hate the things that we do not understand. I want to get to know my hair a little better everyday, so that I can learn how to better learn to love every strand. I'm sure every lady can relate to me and my hair struggles. Fellas, not quite sure if you all go through this. Maybe with your facial hair? Let me know! Let me know everyone's hair struggles so I can feel a little better about my own. It truly is a constant battle to not be so easily controlled by these follicles. Now I must think of my next chapter. I've had this style for too long. When my hair is stagnant, I'M stagnant. Your hair should be whatever YOU want it to be. Society will always have their idea of what it should be, but YOU loving it is the first step to everyone else loving it. There will always be some sort of expectation for YOUR hair, but if you like it, that really is the only thing that matters. Just look at any 80s movie and you'll see how different we viewed "a cute hairstyle". Yikes! So much to say about hair, so little time!
p.s. My favorite hair instagrams for inspiration are @thecutlife, @anthonycuts, and @miryamlumpini (the last girl is actually a tattoo artist, but her hairstyles are so LIFEEE!)
p.p.s. Actually, I'm glad that my hair has the shape shift factor. I have the ability to wear it curly and big, or straight if I wanted to. Some people can't get their hair to curl to save their life! However, why df are curly hair products so darn expensive???
p.p.p.s. I really do sometimes think about going really short, even though everyone always tells me longer is better... screw society! The only reason I probably wouldn't is because I know I'de be super bored of not being able to do long hairstyles any more. Oh hair, why you so complicated??